簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)幽默笑話帶翻譯
1.、
The preacher was vexed because a certain member of his congregation always fell asleep during the sermon.
As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon. So, in a whisper, he asked the congreg
ation. "All who want to go to heaven，please rise." Everyone got up except the snorer. After whispering "Be seated", the minister shouted at the top of his voiced, "All those who want to be with the devil, please rise."
Awaking with a start, the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacher standing tall and angry in the pulpit, "Well, sir," he said, "I don't know what we're voting on, but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it."
瞌睡者
牧師非常生氣，因?yàn)榭傆幸粋�(gè)人在他說(shuō)教時(shí)打瞌睡。一個(gè)星期天，正當(dāng)坐在前排的那個(gè)人又在瞌睡時(shí)，牧師決定要好好教育他一下，讓他不要再在布道時(shí)睡覺(jué)。于是他低聲對(duì)信徒們說(shuō)：“想去天堂的人，都請(qǐng)站起來(lái)吧。”所有的人都站了起來(lái)——當(dāng)然，除了那個(gè)打瞌睡的人。在低聲說(shuō)過(guò)請(qǐng)坐后，牧師高聲喊道：“想去下地獄的人請(qǐng)站起來(lái)!”打瞌睡的人被這突然的喊叫聲驚醒了，他站了起來(lái)。看到牧師高站在教壇上，正生氣的看著他。這個(gè)人說(shuō)道：“噢，先生，我不知道我們?cè)谶x什么，但看上去只有你和我是候選人。”
2.、
Logic Reasoning
A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic.
"Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin
g for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?"
A girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?"
邏輯推理
小學(xué)四年級(jí)的'教師正在給學(xué)生們上一堂邏輯課。她舉了這么一個(gè)例子：“有這樣一種情況，一個(gè)男人在河中心的船上釣魚，突然失去重心掉進(jìn)了水里。于是他開(kāi)始掙扎并喊救命。他的妻子聽(tīng)到了他的喊聲，知道他并不會(huì)游泳，所以她就急忙跑向河岸。誰(shuí)能告訴我這是為什么?” 一個(gè)女生舉手答道，“是不是去取他的存款?”
[注]bank在英語(yǔ)中除了我們平時(shí)很熟悉的“銀行”之外，還有“河岸”的意思。
3.、
Goethes Tolerance
Goethe was once strolling on a narrow path in a park in Weimar. As luck would have it, he met with a critic who was hostile to him. Both of them stopped, staring at each other. Then the critic said, "I'll never make way for a fool." "But I will," with that Goethe retreated aside.
歌德的容忍
一次，歌德正在魏瑪一個(gè)公園的一條狹窄小道上散步。碰巧他遇見(jiàn)一個(gè)對(duì)他懷有敵意的評(píng)論家。兩人都停了下來(lái)，彼此相互對(duì)視。接著評(píng)論家說(shuō)道：“我從來(lái)不給傻瓜讓路。” “可我給。”說(shuō)完歌德退到了一邊。
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